Funny One Liners & Quotes
1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn’t.
2.. I don’t suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3.. Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.
4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5.. Don’t take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
6.. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9.. I’m not a complete idiot — Some parts are just missing.
10..Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12..God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13..The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14..Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15..Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
16..Being “over the hill†is much better than being under it!
17..Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
18..Procrastinate Now!
19..I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
20..A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21..A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
22..Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25..A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
26..Ham and eggs. A day’s work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27..The trouble with life is there’s no background music.
28..The original point and click inter face was a Smith & Wesson.
29..I smile because I don’t know what the hell is going on.
July 12th, 2007 at 2:34 pm
I love these jokes.
July 26th, 2007 at 12:49 pm
ye hami thay jinn k libass per sar e rah sayahi likhi gae
!!teri manzil hai boland itni k shaam o sahar ………..chand sooraj se tere darr ko salaam aya hai
!!!!na raha janoon e rog e wafa ………ye na samaj dar ka roog kaya……..yehi daag thay jo saja k hum…….sar e bazm yaar chale gae…!!!
August 30th, 2007 at 11:38 am
i like funny sayari ,jokes,quotes etc.. B coz i dont know how to laugh.
September 12th, 2007 at 6:32 am
Really …Amezing shayari I like It….
October 24th, 2007 at 8:11 am
kare jao
kare jao
kare jao
beshaemo ki tarah msg receive
kare jao khud na karna
December 2nd, 2007 at 6:39 am
please tum log God ka naam is funny shayari mein mat lao mein in logon per laanat bhejti hoon jo ye kaam kar rahe hain